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Love Heals

Some pretty unhappy people in the world today. I look around me and feel so sad for the ones who are so full of judgement and condemnation. To me, that is a clear sign of their distress. I don’t know how many times I have talked about expectation and shoulding, but it appears I am about to again.

Folks, no one will see things the same way you do every time. Perspectives are similar to fingerprints in that no two peoples are the same. We are shaped by different experiences, different personalities, different responses to trauma and stimuli.

Let me make this as clear as I can.

HEALTHY, HAPPY PEOPLE, DO NOT SPEND THEIR TIME CRITIQUING AND JUDGING OTHERS! 

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Good grief the hate is strong these days. I am seriously just lonely for people who can live life with contentment and peace, while lifting people up, rather than tearing them down.

I used to feel defensive. I used to want to stand up to the haters. But my perspective has changed. I do not seek confrontation. What would I say to someone so filled with anger, grief, shame, hatred, and/or resentment? People who are content and happy with their lives do not go around treating others this way. Social media is especially conducive to such harsh judgments, as people don’t have to face any real life consequences for their mean behavior.

But here’s the thing. Happy people, healthy people, they wont be judging you. They will be lifting you up. Offering helpful advice. Using their empathy. Understanding that we all have different circumstances and perspectives.

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Photo by Prateek Katyal on Pexels.com

I watched a group of “empaths” attack another woman for saying that she isn’t attracted to animals today. It hurt my heart to see so many people claiming to be “healers and lightworkers” tearing someone down like that. Telling her she wasn’t an empath and didn’t belong in the group. Feels a bit like a “check the log in your own eye” kind of moment honestly. I watched their judgement and condemnation with pity for them. Thinking so high of themselves when they can’t see the glaring truth of their misery and how they are allowing their unhealed cuts to bleed on those who haven’t hurt them.

It hurts my heart to see people being so mean and judgmental of each other. Why are we lashing out at one another? We must make an effort to heal ourselves, and try not to concern ourselves so much with the behaviors of people we have never even met, and never will. It goes for personal relationships too, but I am talking about the uninhibited urge to just start demeaning and belittling someone who doesn’t think or act just like we do.

Happiness, contentedness, joy, whatever you want to call it, comes from within us, not from other people modifying their behavior to accommodate us. The more someone lashes out, the meaner they are, the more sadness I feel for them. So afraid to face their own demons that they have to distract themselves by attacking others who are just posing an innocent question. Why do we as humans feel so compelled to expect others to behave how we think we would, when most of us aren’t even happy with who we are?

It is our responsibility to seek the healing we require. It is our responsibility to be accountable for ourselves. It is not our responsibility to tell others how to live. It is not our responsibility to judge, shame, and bully others into thinking that our way of thinking is the only right way. If we go around thinking that if others just thought and behaved differently, we would be happy, then we are in for a world of shock and hurt when reality hits. Nobody is capable of making us happy. Nobody is capable of healing our wounds, or padding the world so we can hide from them forever.

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WE MUST BE RESPONSIBLE FOR OUR OWN HEALING. WE MUST BE RESPONSIBLE FOR OUR OWN HAPPINESS. 

No one can do it for us.

And while we are healing, there is no reason we can’t be kind and empathetic to what others are going through. As a matter of fact, you might be surprised at how far a little kindness goes in healing your own damaged self. Its pretty amazing the transformation that takes place in us when we replace judgement and hatred with kindness and compassion.

Next time you feel compelled to shame, belittle, or insult someone, maybe consider what is in your own self that is causing you to lash out at others, and maybe, just maybe, try to find a little empathy and kindness for them instead.

The amount of healing that takes place when we replace the hatred with love is indescribable.

The amount of healing that takes place when we respond with compassion rather than judgement is not something you can imagine until you have experienced it.

Just humor me and try it. Next time you feel like lashing out at someone. Judging them. Shaming them. Telling them they don’t belong in your group. Try responding with love instead. See how it increases the joy in your own heart. Hatred and judgement do not increase joy, for anyone. They increase the hatred and judgement. If you want a healthier world, start with yourself, and check your hate at the door.  If you want a healthier world, focus on lifting people up, finding empathy and compassion, and treating them with love. It will change you. It will make you happier. It will make you healthier. It will steal less of your limited time and joy on this Earth. If for no ones sake but your own, try love. It feels so much better than hate. Try compassion. It adds so much more to life than judgement does. Try empathy. It is good for ones heart to put ourselves in anothers shoes for a moment of reflection.

Everyone wants to be loved. Everyone wants to be accepted and fit somewhere. Think about how you would hope to be treated, and then treat others as well as you would want to be treated.

Just try it. Check the hate and try Love. It will transform you.

 

 

 

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Pesky Little Four Letter Word: Hate

I am pretty lucky to have this blessed little life of mine. I sit here in this quiet, snowy countryside wonderland, and life is peaceful. I am lucky to be privileged with this peaceful life. I often relish the fact that I am living a 20 mph life in a 60 mph world. For the most part, I choose when to engage in the worlds madness. And lately, I haven’t chosen a whole lot of that chaos.

However, It does get lonely sometimes, and naturally, I turn to the outside world. Today, as I sit here in my quiet stillness, I am consumed with the nagging little four letter word “hate”. I have come to believe in my life, that Love is the only thing that really matters in the end. I want to be the change I wish to see in this world, and to do that, I must put more love out there every day. I am struck by the amount of hate in the name of “good” that I see. Hate can never come from “good”. Hate is hate, plain and simple. I don’t care if you are hating the right, hating the left, or hating for the sake of hating, when you share your judgmental memes and opinions, full of hatred and condemnation, all I see is hate. I know you. I know you as a loving human being. I know you as a person who wants to see more love in the world. I know you as someone who believes in peace, and then I see you spew your hate. Righteous, indignant, judgmental hate, and all I see is hate. We hate over politics, we hate over individual opinions, we hate with half the story and we hate with the whole story. It is becoming the mantra of our nation. Who can we hate today? Who can we smear today? Who can we be better than today? Who can we shame today? All this hatred in the name of “good”. It is so misguided. If you want to be the change you want to see, you need to be focusing on spreading love, spreading joy, and spreading light. Hating, judging, and shaming people who don’t behave as we see fit is just ugly. It is ugly on us. It makes people look at us and see hatred, darkness, and judgement. Is that who you want to be? Is that what you want the world to see? Righteous hatred is still hatred. Every time you spew it, the rest of us see hate. We see darkness.

You think your hate is justified. You think your hate will fix a situation? Somehow improve it? Since when has hate ever improved anything? Energy is multiplied. If we put out hate and judgement, that is the energy the world receives from us. We see ourselves as loving, empathetic people, until we don’t like what someone else thinks or does, and then we hate. Here is a little secret. You can’t have deep down sustainable joy if you are hosting hate. Even righteous hate. Its still dark and ugly. I am sitting here, in a somber state, feeling sad, that so many of the people that I have seen as loving, gentle souls in my life, have so much hate and judgement spewing from them.

Every time we hate, the division grows larger. The hate grows more vast. It expands, it multiplies. We judge those who are different from us, creating more judgement, more darkness, and even more divide. Take a minute, scroll through your feed. How much judgement and hate have you spewed? You see it as righteous hate. I see ugly, dark hate.

We want a change. We all want a change. And so, we hop on social media and spew more hate. We take up a cause and blindly rally for it at any cost, without seeing how the rest of the world see’s the hate we are spewing. We think ” I just cannot tolerate this behavior” and we spew it out on social media.

It doesn’t matter which side your hate is for or against. It is still hate. You feel justified in your hate because its “the right thing to do”. Since when is hate EVER the right thing to do? And what makes your “right thing to do” the standard of right and wrong? Hate solves nothing. Hate continues to divide us. Judgement divides us. Nothing gets done when we are busy hating. If we really want to be the change we want to see, then we need to love. We need to summon some maturity and set aside our childish hatred. We need to listen to each other and find compromises and solutions, rather than shaming and condemning one another. We need to take a minute to hear the other side and find a common ground. We need to compromise and meet in the middle. We need to stop for a minute, and consider, before we hit that mighty little share button, if we are spewing love or hate. How does anyone think that we can create good from hate? How does anyone think that we can create light from darkness?

People whom I have sat with, dreamed of a better way with. I see them spewing hate. People whom I have known to be the peacemakers and the healers, they are spewing hate. I implore of you, please, look at your words. Look at what you are putting out there. Does it have hate in it? Does it have judgement in it? Does it make you look like you think that you are better than others? We are all humans. We all have some things wrong. Every. Single. One. Of. Us. is wrong some of the time. Every single one of us has made mistakes, had differing opinions, and see’s things through a different color glasses than our neighbor. Each of us has a unique life experience, and those experiences shape us, and that makes each of us as unique as our fingerprints. You cannot possibly understand where each person is coming from when they form their opinions and make their decisions. I imagine if we shined a spotlight on your life, we could all find things to hate too. No one is ever going to see every issue in the same light you do. You will be lonely and sad if you limit your friends to only those who agree with you. All these “if you support such and such just unfriend me now”. Really? If I unfriended everyone who suggested that I unfriend them over a difference in opinion, I could just quit social media.

Come on people. I know you see yourselves as the lovers, healers, and peacemakers. Can we just be the bigger person? Can we agree to let the hate stop with us? Can we roll right past it and look for some love to share?

The media will always strive to divide us. They rely on ratings, and drama gets ratings. It is the nature of the beast. We cannot let them fuel our emotions and drive hatred in us. We must rise up above the hatred, and start spreading the love. Forget their ratings. Forget their emotionally driven “news’ that is manipulated to draw us in, get us emotional, and force us to take sides. I know we can do it. I know if you saw what I do when I see your latest post come across my feed, that you would be sad that I think of hate when I think of you. That I don’t see a peacemaker, I see a hater. I can’t be the only one. I see judgmental, emotionally driven responses. I see division. I see darkness and hatred. I know you, and I know that your heart carries love, and I wish you could know how the hate darkens it. I wish you could see the hate and vow to become a lover again. I long to see the healers and the peacemakers sharing love and light again.

Its lonely in my little 20 mph life sometimes, but when I venture out of it, I see hate and judgement so rampant, so prevalent. And I see a nation of people who are longing for a change. I am stuck in the thought that this hate wont bring the change we wish to see. We must remember that love is what is important. We must create more light to combat the darkness.

And so for today, I step outside my comfortable little 20 mph life, hoping and pleading with you to see the hate that you spew for what it is. To see it as the disease that it is, spreading rampantly though us. I am pleading for people everywhere to see the hate for what it is and decide to bury it. Cover it with a light that shines so bright, that it retreats to the darkness where it belongs. Let it start with you. Decide to go against the grain. Decide to hop off all of those righteous political and spiritual bandwagons, and just start thinking about how you can add light to someones day today. Scroll past the judgement, block the hate. Let it die with you. Bury it, and let the love shine from you instead. Please.

Can we all just please try? Try to judge one less person today. Try to bless one more person today. Spread your love. Spread your light. Let the hate die at your fingertips.

This post is rather out of character for me. I rarely give things like hate the time of day. I am uncomfortable as I hit publish, because I really want to be a source of loving light. I really want to be the change I wish to see, and right now, I just wish to see a stop to the rampant hate. And so, today I beg. I plead. I implore of you, to just take a look within.

What are you spewing?

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Love

Hello my friends! I hope today’s post finds you well! I have this itch. It has been so long since I have written. Since my injury, typing is a challenge that I am learning to overcome. Today, I peck at the keys, not caring one bit about the icy hot burn in my hand as I get this message out. The desire to write is overwhelming as I ache to reach the world with this message about abounding love. I keep hearing that there is not enough love in the world today, but I know that that is false. There is more abounding love in this world than we can even wrap our brains around as humans. It is huge, golden, and encompasses the world in more abundance that we can imagine. What there is a lack of is kindness, trust, and willingness to open our arms to love. We as humans are refusing to choose love. Refusing to accept it. It is up to us to receive it. If our hearts are closed to it, then it cannot enter us. It bounces off of us and goes unrequited in this world! We absolutely must be willing to receive the love that is coming towards us! Love is abundant. Contagious! We must spread the virus! We must share it and receive it in order to perpetuate it. People! Come on! You are beautiful! See it! Then, once you see it, share it! Accept it! Receive it! Love is yours for the taking. Your life will change so drastically when you finally choose to see the love. The abundance. The beauty. When you focus on giving and receiving love, it becomes so overwhelmingly abundant around you that you cannot contain it and you want to shout it from the rooftops, as I am today!

When you go to your grave, it will not matter how many acts of service you have done. It will not matter how much money you put into the pot in tithe. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. We are all here for different purposes, some tithe money, others tithe time, but the one thing that we all need to do is show gladness! Joy! What is the state of your heart? Are you tithing and providing acts of service because you love God? Because you know Gods love and want everyone to know the joy? Or are you tithing with a bitter heart because you would rather spend that money elsewhere. God forgives us easily when we fail, it is ours for the asking, but what was your hearts intention? That question WILL matter. How much love did you reciprocate in the world? How much forgiveness and Jesus like grace did you try to emanate. Did you accept everyone for who they are? Or did you choose which ones to love and which to condemn? It is Gods place to judge and save. We are not here to save people. We are here to show Gods love. Very simply! To let a lady in line in front of you, to give a broken hearted little girl words of encouragement, to empathize with the broken. God chooses the broken, the weary, to favor. Love them, do NOT judge them.

When you meet your maker, it will not matter how big your house was, how nice your car was. You cannot take any of that with you and it will not bring you joy. Only the love of God can bring that fearless, joyful, contagious love, and sustain it. Its huge, its monstrous, and it breaks my heart that so few are willing to receive it! All you have to do is try. Try to start seeing your challenges as the blessings they will turn out to be in the end. Try seeing a long line as an opportunity to let someone who is elderly or ill jump in line in front of you. Just watch her gratitude. Turn around and see the face of the person who just witnessed your random act of kindness. One simple act can make four people face the day with a more loving perspective! You can do it! Receive the love! Spread the love! Share Gods joy! Ask God every day when you wake up, to flood you with love and peace. Every time you leave your house, ask him for an opportunity to share love, to give random joy out by the armfuls. Ask Him to give you an opportunity to share his love and blessing. Look at your life! It is beautiful. What do you love? Do you have beautiful children? A roof over your head? Food in your mouth? Pleasant weather? A job? Those are all gifts given to us from Gods love! Be thankful for them, joyful for them, and share them! Is there a beautiful bird in your tree? Is the scent of fall on the breeze? What has God blessed you with today? It has occurred to me that every challenge is a blessing in disguise. That with each struggle, we find a solution, we grow, we learn to appreciate, we become more beautiful human beings as our patience grows with them. It occurs to me that every single challenge we face is an opportunity for God to bless us abundantly. How boring would life be without challenge? How spoiled and demanding we would all be! How selfish we would be! What need would we have for God? A world with no challenge, to me, appears to be a world with no love, and no reason to hope, and that is not appealing to me. I challenge you to see your burdens as an opportunity for God to bless you. I challenge you to see them as a reason to be thankful and full of love for a God who provides tools to teach us how to be awesome. I challenge you, to go out into your world today, and show a ridiculous amount of love to one stranger who needs it. Let her in line, pay for his burger, offer to carry a bag. It is in you. Your life is NOT so busy and awful that you cannot find one shred of love to share with a stranger. Share what you can, its enough to make a difference, and do it simply out of love. Be determined to be a major player in the circle of love, and spread it. Spread the joy. Spread the love, and watch it unfold back on you one thousandfold. God is Love. Jesus is love. Grace is the gift that they have bestowed upon us! Accept it! Share the love like your life depends on it, and you will find that all along, it was the one thing your life depended on most!